Posts Tagged ‘bedrest’

Ha ha ha!

{ May 8, 2008 @ 7:28 pm } · { Uncategorized }
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So, apparently whoever said that bed rest is boring didn’t have a crazy 19-month old running around and they must not have had wonderful friends coming over to serve who bring their crazy kids to add to the chaos  and they must not have observed their sweet, wonderful, loving, adorable husband working his pa-tootie off as he is now father, mother, housekeeper, caretaker, cook, and breadwinner! Oh yes, and since the recent demolition  of our shower, I should also add that he is now Home Improver Extraordinaire! I tell you, there’s nothing that man can’t do :)

So yes, the last few days God has been so kind to make the somewhat mundane task of being a professional couch potato, rather hilarious! Sophie’s favorite new hobby is pulling wet toys out of the bathtub, rolling them all over the house and effectively soaking the floors. Today, poor Mandy has been run ragged by two crazy girls who decide to break down emotionally at the same time, one getting her leg stuck in the crib rails and the other running into doors and hallways. Then there was yesterday that had Chris running like a crazy man filling prescriptions, taking me to the doctor, grabbing some groceries, mowing the lawn, preparing for HG worship, making dinner and then trying to get Sophie to eat it as she threw french fries off her tray with wild abandon! Thank you, Lord, for laughter :)

In other news, we had pretty good report at the Doctor’s. My rapid progression and dilation over the last few weeks seems to have slowed down a bit, which is an answer to prayer! We now have some meds for contractions and don’t have to haul ourselves to Winnie Palmer twice a week for monitoring anymore which we’re SO thankful to God for… that was getting pretty tedious. And I’m now 32 weeks and 4 days (but who’s counting right?)! God willing, we’ll have another 3 weeks and 3 days of laying low, then I’ll be taken off of bed rest and Thomas can come anytime!

Here are a few pictures from our crazy week :)

The Latest

{ April 28, 2008 @ 4:03 pm } · { Uncategorized }
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So, my appointment was on Thursday and Chris stayed home with Sophie because she was sick, so Mandy took me. We were hoping for not change, however my cervix has shortened another 1/2 a centimeter and now I need to go to the hospital twice a week to have my contractions monitored.  While I was there at the office, I was ok. It wasn’t what I wanted to hear, but still, ok. And then driving home I guess I was just thinking about it and wondering why I’m still having contractions and why my cervix is so short and is bedrest going to work, will I have to be admitted to the hospital, what’s going to happen with Sophie if that happens, etc…. so by the time I got home, I walked in and sat down and told Chris that I really just needed to cry for a minute :) So Thursday was rough for sure; all day long different fears and worries kept coming and I would just kind of shove them away and try not to think about it. Then that night, I read this quote on the girltalk blog:
“If you really want to fight fear, learn to fear Someone who captures your attention in such a way that your other fears suddenly seem pedestrian and unimportant.” Ed Welch
And I feel like God told me that I’ve been fearing my circumstances and the “what if’s” MORE than I actually fear God and desire His will. I know and believe that His will is good and perfect, but by my worry and anxiety I’m actually saying that I think that my plan is better. If I truly do BELIEVE that God is sovereign and BELIEVE that His will is perfect, than how could I be fearful?
   I want to be careful not to “waste my bedrest” (to steal a line from John Piper) and I think that I have been so far. With each contraction I pray and plead and ask God to keep Thomas in until He’s full term, or 35 weeks and try to shove away scenarios of of going to the hospital or my water breaking… instead of reminding myself with each pain and contraction that God’s timing is perfect and if Thomas is born today, then that’s God’s will and that’s WHAT I WANT. Not that it’s wrong to pray and ask God and submit the desire of a full term delivery to him, but I feel like in doing that, I’ve been clinging to it instead of surrendering it to Him and really truly fearing Him more than I do my thoughts. Instead walking through each day wondering fearfully if “today’s the day” and counting down the days and finding my reassurance as I check off the weeks, I desire to walk through this time with joy. My focus has not been bringing God glory through this; it’s been about what I want and please, God, make it happen! If I fear the Lord and desire His will above all else, I can be joyful each day as the contractions come and go and I can walk into the Winnie Palmer Triage when the time comes and not be fearful! I’ve said many times that I just want to be excited the next time we go to the hospital… well, I can be. Whether it’s tonight or 6 weeks from now, I can have joy knowing that this is the day that God has ordained and planned for Thomas to come into the world and it’s not scary, because God’s plan is the BEST POSSIBLE plan for me, for Chris, for Sophie and for Thomas. Ultimately, God must receive the glory! 
Lord, please help my weak, sinful heart. I long to glorify You through this season that you have brought. Please forgive my fearful worry and anxiety; my lack of trust in You and in Your good and perfect will. Father, teach me to fear You above all else; to desire Your will before mine. You are faithful and worthy to be praised today and tomorrow!!

A fine line…

{ April 16, 2008 @ 6:05 pm } · { Uncategorized }
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Good afternoon!

So the last few nights since Sunday evening, I’ve been contracting/cramping a fair bit. Nothing incredibly regular and not enough to call the doctor, but enough to open the floodgates of my fears and worries! I often get tricked into thinking that I’m doing a great job trusting God with my baby and the fear of delivering very early, until I start having contractions… then I realize that what I thought was trusting God, was actually just me feeling really good and not struggling with worry at the moment.

Right now, I’m praying for God to help me have faith and trust at the same time. For example, I know that God can do all things and have FULL FAITH that he can carry Thomas and I through the next 8 weeks and give us a full term delivery. But in having faith for it and asking God for it, I can easily begin to idolize and hold way too tightly to that and almost be in a sort of denial that anything will go wrong. But on the other hand, when I surrender my desires to God and ask that His will be done I need to be really careful and search my heart because… what if God’s will is that I go into labor this week and Thomas is born at 29 weeks and needs to spend time in the NICU? What will my reaction be? I would like to say that I would trust God that He is good and His timing is perfect and would not be devastated that things did not go to full term. Oh Lord, help my sinful heart! Please be patient with my doubt and unbelief and cause me to desire your will above all!!

So today, I’m practicing faith in God’s sovereignty and fully believing that He can do all things and trusting Him regardless of when our baby is born. He is good and we want to be found in His will. 

Oooh, I think I’ll take a shower this afternoon! It’s funny when one of the highlights of your day is a shower :)